Persecution in Paradise

I'm not sure what to write this about. I mean a lot has happened since my last post. It's just so hard to target one specific thing to write about. I have so many thoughts and experiences floating around in my head. I think I should start with the most important.

This past Saturday I lead two young men's Bible studies. One at noon and one in the afternoon. The first one went on as planned. But the afternoon study didn't go as planned. I had a lesson planned out, but God always has a way of changing my plans. Only one guy showed up for my evening Bible study. As I was cracking my Bible open the young guy confronted me with something.

"My brother has been correcting me for not respecting buddhism. My family has been asking me about my religion. They don't know I'm Christian and I'm afraid to tell them."

That's when I closed my Bible to listen to his story. He told me about how his friends have been rebuking him for his Christianity. They have been telling him that Christianity is bad and that he should turn back to buddhism. He is absolutely terrified to tell his parents. He doesn't want to disappoint them and really isn't sure how they'll react. His family has been questioning his loyalty to buddha because apparently they can tell that he has shied away from the religion. He has been so confused. He is a new Christian and is still learning a lot.

I read scripture to him. I told him that Christ warned us about persecution. We had a long discussion and in the end I feel he walked away with clarification. It will be hard for him, but I have no doubt that this is only a bump in the road for him. The thing that really got to me was that here I was coaching him on what Christ says to do, but I felt I had no business telling him this. I know that it was my duty to inform him, but I have never faced any real persecution as a Christian. I was raised in a Christian home. Most of my close friends have all been Christian and those who weren't Christian never gave me heck about being Christian. I have never been rebuked, scorned, or ill treated for being Christian. If Christ warned that his followers would face persecution, why haven't I? Honestly, after I spoke with this young guy I became angry. I became angry with myself. I wanted to be able to give this kid advice from first hand experience. In the same situation, how would I react? It's easy to say I would never deny Christ, but in a very real situation, would I stick to my guns? Peter said he would never deny Christ, but before the rooster crowed he denied Christ thrice. I pray that when I am faced with that very real situation, I will have strength to stand for truth. I pray that you will too. It's easy to talk to the talk, but when looking in the eyes of rebuking loved ones, facing an angry crowd, or looking down the barrel of a gun, will you have the guts to stand for Christ?

Think about it.

Happy Birthday Grandpa!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!

I still feel dirty

If you don't know about the Tonle Sap, well you need to know that the lake is used for everything. The locals use it for bathing, washing clothes, cooking food, personal sewage, and not to mention drinking. Ask anyone who's been there, this water is NASTY.

Last Wednesday, during our play time, one of the girls decided to go off the boat and go get something to drink. The only way on and off the boat is to walk down a plank that leads to the shore. Normally as the kids are walking off the boat I shake the plank just a bit, just to tease them. As the girl walked off I playfully started wobbling the plank. Unfortunately this time the girl lost her balance and fell into the water. She stood up and started crying. The girl wasn't hurt, but I had just embarrassed her in front of her classmates. I felt awful. I went over and tried to console her, but to no avail. I sent the girl back up the plank, back to the boat. I knew the only way to redeem myself was to allow this girl to get justice. I stood on that plank contemplating other options, but this seemed to be the most effective way to replenish this girl's sense of dignity. I told the kids to wobble the plank as much as they possibly could. The children jumped at the opportunity. How often do you get the golden opportunity to shake your teacher into the water? They tried their hardest to shake me off my balance, but my weight was too much for them. I knew what was about to happen. I was about to fake getting off balance and fall into the utterly disgusting water below. They shook with all their might. I "lost my balance" and lept off the plank. I remember my last thought right before hitting the water... why. I landed in the water horizontally faced down. Everything went under, head and all. I stood up and the children were in a frenzy of laughter, even the little girl. I made my way back up to the boat. I literally felt a certain filth all over my body. It was like my body was wrapped in a film of disgustingness.

After falling in the water, the other children decided to go for a swim. They used the rest of their play time swimming. Many of the kids jumped in the water and pushed each other in. They were having a great time. Sey and I were standing off to the side talking. That's when one of the children cried out, "Teacher!" Sey and I quickly turned our attention over to the children. One little girl had been pushed in and she didn't know how to swim. Her head was being held just above the water by one of the students aboard the boat. She was screaming for help. The kids weren't strong enough to pull her up onto the boat. The wakes from boats would come and cover her face. Sey and I quickly darted off towards them. We jumped over the boat railing to where the kids were. I layed down on my belly and grabbed her hand. I lifted her up onto the boat where she started spitting water and coughing. Sey ran and grabbed her a towel. The little girl sat there and shivered for the rest of the class time. I was surprised though. I assumed that all the children that lived on the lake knew how to swim. It would make sense that the parents would teach their children to swim. It must be an important skill for their survival. It makes me wonder how many children die each year from drowning. It would be easy for toddlers to wander right off their homes and into the water. If Sey and I hadn't been there, she could have easily drown.

The day didn't end there. After everyone settled down from the incident the kids continued to swim. The all jumped in and when they were in the water they yelled up to me, "Teacher!" they were wanting me to come swimming with them. I was hesitant. Not only was this water rancid, it was crawling with snakes. Nearly everyday I've been out on that lake, I've seen people carrying dead snakes. I've even been invited over for dinner where the main course was snake. Unlike Indiana Jones, I do not have a fear of snakes. However, I do have a smart respect for them. But something told me that if I didn't go swimming with my students at least once, I would regret it. So I tossed my shirt to the side and sent my body hurdling over the side into the (extremely) murky water below. I plunged deep into the dark waters. I could feel weeds and plants that were growing from the bottom, this water was very deep though. I reemerged to the surface and all the kids were laughing and carrying on. I squeezed every muscle in my lips to make sure that no water got inside. It didn't matter how much I squeezed, water somehow always made it into my mouth. I was constantly spitting out dirty brownish black water. We swam for a while, but eventually we all got tired and got out. This was the one day that I missed the Ocoee river in Cleveland.

I went home took a thorough shower, dried off, and took another shower.

Crocodile Rock

I apologize for not writing in a while.

Well a lot has happened since I last wrote, but I'll start with last Thursday. I went to the boat just to visit with my buddy Sey and hopefully go down river to see some crocodiles. My real intent was to find a baby crocodile that I could hold. I had been watching a lot of Animal Planet and watching old Steve Irwin documentaries. Not many know this, but the crocodile hunter was one of my childhood heroes. This motivated me to go and find a baby croc, just for fun. We arranged for a boat to take us down river. We went to a store where they keep crocs in a hole. I had been there already with the American teams twice. Once there, I asked them I they had any baby crocs. Unfortunately they didn't. So then I asked them if I could get a picture holding one of their giant catfish. Their reply was "if you can catch it". So I layed face down on the dock with the catfish pit below me. There were fish in this hole that were so big they could eat a chihuahua. The biggest one I saw looked to be about 4 feet long. Just about as long as my leg. I slowly placed my hands in the water and waited for the fish to swim in between them. The water was murky and I couldn't see what was lying below. I kept expecting a whopper to jump after me and take me under. Fish kept swimming between my hand and I kept grabbing at them, but their slick skin allowed them to slip right out of my hand. I managed to pull one out of the water, but it was kicking like crazy. It kicked so much that it slipped it's way back into the water. I gave up on this endeavor and decided to keep pursuing after my baby crocodile.

Some of the locals recommended a place where I could find a croc. It was not too far from the Common Grounds restaurant. Other things happened there at that store, but that story is for another time.

I ventured back to Siem Reap in search of this crocodile farm that they referred to me. When I arrived at the crocodile farm they let me look at their crocs. They had crocs of all ages and sizes. It was insane how many crocodiles they had. I don't think it would be far fetched to say they had 200 - 300 crocodiles here. Some of the crocs were massive! I was amazed how many crocodiles they had. Although, this would be a crocodile enthusiasts nightmare. This farm's habitat conditions were extremely poor. The crocs looked miserable. They were all scarred up. I found the baby crocs and asked the lady behind the counter if I could hold one. She looked at me like I had just asked her if could pour mayonnaise on her head. 

"No, because the crocodile might bite you and we don't want you to get hurt."

"It's okay if I get bitten. In fact, it would be a really good picture." (Believe me, I didn't want to get bitten. I just needed to communicate that I wasn't concerned with getting bitten.)

She reluctantly let me hold it. I grabbed the ferocious beast (aka the little baby crocodile) by the back of the neck so it wouldn't turn and bite me. With my other hand I grabbed the tail so that it wouldn't be wiggling around trying to get away.

Here is the result! Proof that half of my childhood dream is complete, to hold a baby crocodile. Now I just have to complete the other half, jump on and be involved in capturing a full grown crocodile. Yippee!

Tomorrow I'll have another post, so be looking out for it.

Rubber balls!

On my way to the Tonle Sap, I saw some rubber balls hanging from a hook out in front of a store. We have toys out on the boat, but most of them are wearing down. I had been looking for something to get the kids that they all would enjoy. When I saw the balls, I knew my kids would love them. I had my moto driver pull over. I wasted no time negotiating a price with the shop keeps. It took me a while, but I finally got them at the price I wanted them. I bought 5o rubber balls. Needless to say, they were extremely excited. They looked at me like a conquering hero. It's amazing how something so simple as a rubber ball can make these kid's day. They had a blast!

After that was not so fun though. We had some problems with some of the young girls. Sey and I have been very lenient on them. Lately we have been trying to place more structure on them and not letting them talk so much. But for some reason some of the girls are having trouble acclimating to our new policies. We had to sit them down for a serious talk, because they weren't listening to us. We told them they needed to settle down, because if they didn't we were going to start enforcing some rules. Even during our talk, the girls continued to disregard what we were saying. We were forced to kick one of the girls off the boat to prove we were serious. This changed the whole attitude of the class. All the young girls were angry with us. They didn't communicate this to us, but it was all over their faces. Class ended and all the girls collaborated. It doesn't matter what culture you're in, complaining people always band together. Hopefully this Friday's class keeps the fun and loses the attitude. I pray that it does. 

Trek the mountain

Tuesday I decided it was about time for an adventure. So I packed up my things and headed for the temple mountain near the Tonle Sap. There are stairs and a path that lead up to the temple. The only problem with taking this path is that there is a guard who stops you and asks for a ticket that you must purchase from a different location. The ticket costs $12 and I didn't have the time nor the desire to spend the money. So I needed to take a different route.

Tada! My route!

I climbed the mountain. I'm sure there must've been a better way up, but the sun would be setting soon and I didn't have time to find it. As I started to climb, the Cambodian children gathered below me and watched. I climbed and climbed. I tested different rocks for stability. About half way up I looked down. It looked like I was 30 feet in the air, it was too late to turn back. I would've never made it back down the same way. I kept going. At one point the rocks below me began to crumble, but I grabbed on to some roots to maintain stability. I finally made it to the top. I looked down to see the kids below me, they were yelling to me. I waved down to them and they waved back. I hiked up the mountain.

Finally I emerged from bushes and saw the temple.

I was so glad I made the trip, because when I made it to the top I befriended a local and saw some very beautiful things.

These structures still amaze me.

I loved how vacant it was here.

I felt so lucky to see a rainbow in this setting.

A picture only says so much, but to be there was beyond words.

Needless to say, the experience was well worth the time. Standing up on the mountain was perfect. I have never had a spiritual moment in nature, but I can honestly say that this was my first. I could see for miles and miles. I could see villages and people. I felt as if God was telling me, "I made this. All this was crafted by my hand. What you see now is only a fragment of my design." I honestly didn't want the moment to end. I sat there until darkness fell. It was a day that I'll never forget.

Teaching the kids has been great. It has been hard though. The boat has a small anchor holding it in place. When a storm comes it blows the boat in so many different directions. It has damaged neighboring boats on the Tonle Sap. We have had to move the boat so many times because the neighbors are scared that they will be smashed by our massive boat. Honestly, the guys who work on the boat are scared someone is going to be seriously hurt by our boat. During storms they become very frightened. I have been reassuring them and trying to boost their morale. Even now, it is storming. Keep them in your prayers. Pray that the massive school boat does no damage. I am certain that my God will keep his hand on this situation.

Sick but not broken

These next few paragraphs are just some things that have been jumbled around in my head for a while.

Sickness. All my life, I have never really gotten sick. Yeah, I've had a cold or two, but never an infection like this. Sickness is always physically fatiguing, but for the first time I was so sick that I was mentally fatigued. How did I get this way? During those hot nights, where I am sweating heavily and can't sleep, I have nothing better to do than think. I think about past, present, and future. I came to the realization of how big what I am doing really is. I realize the opportunity for monumental change is knocking on my door. As this realization comes to mind, so does the realization that I'm 18 and I'm barely out of high school. The doubt builds in my mind. So not only has this sickness taken a toll on my body, it took a toll on my mind.

The opportunity to plant seeds seems limitless. When I look on the lake and see house after house, I don't simply see homes. I see people. People that go about their day without any knowledge of who they truly are. People that are lost and in seek of hope. They are in seek of something more. Am I equipped for this? Am I ready for this task? Am I up to the challenge? What makes me think I have any business even being here? Honestly, it would be easier to just go home. Pack it up and call it quits. I could go home, forget Cambodia, and work on my own life. I could go to my family and friends. Indulging in the conveniency of modern Western comfort sounds pretty good. It sounds especially good while lying in bed feeling like I'm about to croak. I'd be lying if I told you all these things haven't crossed my mind from time to time. 

Deep down, in my heart, I know. It's not coincidence that I'm right here, right now. I miss my friends. I miss my family. I miss Arby's curly fries, movie theater popcorn, and the green hills of Tennessee. All that stuff is great. But I need to recognize where I am. I am a part of something so much bigger than what can be seen on the surface. Lives can be changed, including mine. I have embarked on a journey that could plot the course for the rest of my life. If I give up now, what pattern of choices will I set for my life? Will I quit with other things? My job. My marriage. My life. But if I endure, if I dismiss my doubt and push through, is that the pattern I will set for my life? If I stick it out and stand strong now, maybe this will set a precedent for my entire life. When I feel myself begin to stumble, I think about all those back home who believe in me. I constantly remind myself of all the people who gave money on the notion that I had something to share. I constantly remind myself of all the people who encourage me because they truly believe I can make a significant difference. Most importantly, I think about how my God has provided the way for me to be here. He has picked me up from this sickness and set me back on my feet. My God has come through for me and I have faith that he will continue to do so.

Thank you to all who have supported me and prayed for me. Your prayers and support are reaching me here in Asia. It helps more than you will ever know.